20 Reasons why I would do better as an Animated Character on TV.

1. I always seem to wear the same outfit and still look good in it.
2. I would get to see more people but for only one half hour per week.
3. Things I say always seem to end up on t shirts anyways.
4. Using my life as inspiration you can use it for materials for years or just call it a reality show.
5. I do well with sidekicks, including children, animals, imaginary people, beer drinking and cursing robots and alter egos.
6. My catch phrases are already being shared with others.
7. Some of my stories would be easier to animate considering the legality, audacity, and the WTF factor.
8. I can finally achieve Perfect Hair Forever
9. Who would not enjoy me beating the shit out of Cookie Monster and Orangutans? That's right, no one!
10. Considering that animated alcohol is cheap, you CAN pay me in my own weight.
11. Who else will grab on to that Futurama money? Tosh? That bitch can barely keep people from punking his ass.
12. Guest stars we want to see like Marilyn Manson, Bruce Lee, and Richard Dawkins.
13. Every week we have a segment of People who are stupider than a box of rocks.
14. It would be decently animated despite of drinking most of the money.
15. Fuck that secret word shit......Weekly Drinking game!
16. Weekly segment: Weird Shit Japan is into!
17. Instead of commercials, Adult Film Stars and "dancers" in a comfy chair reading from Classic Literature. You have never heard Carmen Electra read Little Women before.
18. Mythbusters approved physics with explosions
19. A moral lesson and an ending thought from the Archive of Shower Epiphany.
20. Once again, me beating the shit out of Orangutans.

Adult Swim and Comedy Central......I await your call.